• Funny Marriage Quotes: 20 Funniest Quotes About Marriage

Funny Marriage Quotes: 20 Funniest Quotes About Marriage

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Thuday, 07/07/2016 11:07

Read 20 Funniest Quotes About Marriage:

funny marriage quotes

Funny Marriage Quotes

1. People say you can't live without love, but I think oxygen is more important.


2. Marriage is when a man looses his bachelors degree and woman gets her masters degree.


3. Marriage is popular because it combines the maximum of temptation with the maximum of opportunity.

- George Bernard Shaw


4. Advice for bride: don't expect your husband will change after marriage. 

For groom: don't expect your wife won't change!


5. Some relationships are like Tom and Jerry, they argue and disagree all the time, but they still can't live without each other.


6. When I married Ms Right, I didn’t know her first name was “Always” !


7. In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk.

- Rita Rudner


8. Advice for husband: If at first time you don't succeed - try doing it the way your wife told you!


9. I think I'm starting to have a problem with my vision, ever since I got married I haven't seen any money through the entire house.


10. Marriage is like a deck of cards. All you need in the beginning is two hearts and a diamond. After 10 years you need a club and spade.


11. My wife is a psychologist...not only does she know when I’m being a jerk, but she knows exactly what type of jerk I’m being.

- Lee Judge, Kansas City Star


12. If at the end of the wedding party you are married to the one you love - then everything went perfectly!


13. I now pronounce you man and wife, you may now change your Facebook status.


14. Husband is the HEAD of the family and wife is the NECK that turns the head around!


15. Marrying a man is like buying something you've been admiring for a long time in a shop window. You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn't always go with everything else in the house.

- Jean Kerr


16. Remember marriage is like a flower - Keep it fed and watered so it can blossom and grow!


17. When a couple is arguing over who loves who more, the one that gives up is the real winner.


18. We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.


19. Marriage: sometimes soulmates, sometimes cellmates.


20. Behind every successful man is a surprised woman.


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